Tag: Mr. Right

What Makes Someone RIGHT or WRONG For You?

There’s nothing more disheartening than thinking you’ve met “the one” … your Mr. Right or Mrs. Right and they end up being all wrong.  So were they always all wrong or did you ruin them … perhaps you were looking at them through rose colored glasses.  This is something I kept wondering about until I read this great article called Looking for Mr. Right when all you see in Mr. Wrong.  Talk about an aha moment!!  It’s like they wrote it for me and my current challenges.  We’re all looking for that special someone, perhaps some of you have found them … perhaps you THOUGHT you found them and you really didn’t.  So, then, how do you know?

Calling Mr. Right or Mrs. Right!!  Hellooo anyone home?

What makes them so right or so wrong? Well … here’s some things that stood out for me from the article …

  • RIGHT: comes complete, no assembly required and just fits, don’t need to mold or maneuver to fit them into the box
    WRONG: they are a “work in progress” and you’re always trying to mold them into the person you want
  • RIGHT: they are on the same page as you
    WRONG: “can’t even read the book”
  • RIGHT: knows who they are and what they want in the relationship
    WRONG: does not know what they want and self sabotages
  • RIGHT: consistent
    WRONG: inconsistent, changing feelings “as often as their underpants”
  • RIGHT: puts their romantic partner first making them important part of their life
    WRONG: puts themselves first and is always busy, too busy for you
  • RIGHT: works on the relationship, attempts to make things work
    WRONG: comes with lots of baggage, creates excuses because of past relationships
  • RIGHT: won’t let exes interfere with current relationship
    WRONG: still hung up on ex and will let them interfere
  • RIGHT: **single**
    WRONG: NOT single … even if they’re “going to break up”, they’re still not single
  • RIGHT: treats partner with respect, spends quality time with them, makes plans to do activities together
    WRONG: just wants to “hang out”, usually last minute, typically not in public, wants sex or booty call
  • RIGHT: looking for a relationship
    WRONG: looking for no strings sex
  • RIGHT: shows they care with words AND actions
    WRONG: sends mixed signals … all talk and no action
  • RIGHT: dependable
    WRONG: flake

Sound familiar … I have to say YES!! This is definitely the cause of my recent heartache … MR. WRONG!!!  Although I knew all this stuff, it makes it more real when you see it spelled out like that huh? Now perhaps not all of the above applies but if most of it does then you have to ask yourself if you’re wasting your time.  I sure was!

Best advice from the article?

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Always attracting Mr. or Mrs. Wrong?  I know how you feel …

Bad boys aint no good … Good boys aint no fun … Lord knows that I should … Run off with the right one … Me and Mr Wrong get along so good … Even though he breaks my heart so bad … We got a special thing going on.” (Mary J. Blige Mr. Wrong)

Damn!

Do you always end up with Mr. or Mrs. Wrong? Have you found your Mr. or Mrs. Right? Are you Mr. or Mrs. Wrong? Would love to hear from you in the comments!!

 

*This article was originally published on Single Dating Diva.

When Is It Time To Give Up On Love?

I know that you can fall in love at any time during your life, but what if that time never comes?

Can you really go your entire life without meeting “the one?” Some would argue that everyone gets at least one chance at love but may miss out for one reason or another (for instance, the timing just wasn’t right, etc.). Is it possible that we can have true love right in front of us and not realize? Or perhaps we just rationalize that it was never really love to begin with.

I’m not sold on the idea that you need to be in love to have a successful marriage (that’ll be another post, for another day). But I am starting to wonder whether or not it’s worth holding out for love to get married. I think that marriage is more about compatibility than anything else. So if I meet someone that I’m completely compatible with but don’t love why wouldn’t I consider marrying that person? I can’t tell the future (of course), but I’m willing to bet that it’ll be a lot easier to find someone that I’m compatible with versus someone that I truly love.

So with that line of thinking, I sometimes wonder if it’s best to just give up on finding love. Plus, everyone wasn’t meant to be married. There are more women on this earth than men and from what I hear it gets harder to meet someone the older you get. With all of these things working against women, maybe it is a waste of time to think that we’ll find true love.

Now, I’m not saying I’m ready to crawl into a cave just yet but in the back of my mind I wonder if I’m wasting my time hoping for something that will never come…..

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