More than half of all men in committed relationships have admitted to cheating, and according to Oprah.com, 17% of all divorces are caused by infidelity. That’s practically 1 in 5 marriages gone because of cheating! With these depressing figures isn’t it safe to assume that pretty much any man I end up with will be a cheater? Of course, I’m not looking for a cheater and I certainly wouldn’t choose to be with one on purpose, but if I already know that statistically my husband will cheat wouldn’t it make sense to at least seek one with money?
No one really plans to be with a man who isn’t faithful but with all this data pointing towards infidelity, why settle for just an “average cheater” when you can have a rich one? If a man is going to hurt me emotionally, shouldn’t I at least make sure that I’ll be taken care of financially?
Now this is not the same as saying I am looking to marry a man with money or that it’s okay if a rich man cheats on me. All I’m saying is if I am going to be cheated on, I’d rather it be by someone of means than by someone without. Having money doesn’t excuse a man from having an affair, however, it doesn’t make sense for a woman to be cheated on by someone who has nothing either.
I know this may sound crazy but men think the same way to a certain extent, don’t they? There are plenty of good women (aka: wife material) but men go for women who have nice bodies & a pretty face. They probably think that if you have to be stuck with one woman for the rest of your life (hopefully), you might as well get one that’s attractive. To me, that’s the same thing as saying if I have to be with someone who will cheat on me (statistically speaking), it might as well be someone who’s not broke.
At the end of the day, the data proves that most men cheat. And if most men cheat, I might as well get me one with money, right?
Can a man be considered a good father if he cheats on his wife?
Just about every woman I know has been hit on by a married man. Myself included. I can’t respect a man who cheats on his wife plus I’m afraid of bad karma. I would hate to have a torrid love affair with someone who is married, only for my husband to do the same thing to me.
Recently a married man connected with me wanting to hang out. I didn’t know that he was married at the time I gave him my phone number, but I think it slipped it out during one of our subsequent conversations. When I asked him outright he said he wasn’t really married. When I pressed the issue, he stated that his divorce just wasn’t final yet. I told him that without a divorce decree in the eyes of God & according to the state of California that means he’s still married. In other words, a separation is equivalent to being married but it does not equate to being divorced. I also told him over & over that I don’t deal with married men but he just didn’t seem to get the point.
But why would a woman want to date a married – albeit separated – man? I know of plenty of women who wouldn’t mind, but I don’t get why. I mean, wouldn’t they still be considered an adulteress? Or is it considered okay because the man has already left his wife (noticed I said “left” her, not yet “divorced” her). Remember, legally adultery includes men who are separated. Reconciliation accounts for about 20% of all separations* and messing with a married man diminishes these chances. That’s like me spending my dad’s life insurance money because he’s been told he has a 20% chance to live. Just because a man has chosen to walk away from his marriage doesn’t mean you have to play a part in him staying away from his marriage.
According to the latest research the majority of couples who separate end up getting divorced (that’s a no brainer, right?). But what about the couples that actually work things out during their separation and get back together – that 20% I talked about? What if one of the married men that have asked me out falls into this category? I don’t want to get emotionally invested in a man only to find out that he’s going back to his wife. Not to mention that men who are in the middle of a divorce are not emotionally available, let alone ready to get into a serious relationship right away. That’s like going from the “frying pan to the fire” and what man wants to get involved while they’re still involved with their own marriage? These are just some of the reasons why I can’t get involved with married men.
So married men before you hit on me show me your judgment, please!
So today, I’m going into single-woman relapse. My big plans this weekend included washing my hair and reorganizing my underwear drawer. Such a shame, isn’t it? It’s lonely times like this that make me wonder what it would be like to have some companionship, even if it means becoming “the other woman”.
I have had more married men hit on me than should be allowed and while I always turn them away, the thought of entertaining their advances has crossed my mind lately. I am not the type to “steal another woman’s man” but sometimes loneliness can make you think of things that you haven’t thought of before. I know better than to be someone’s mistress, but sometimes I think that some affection is better than no affection. I just get tired of being alone and don’t know when or where my next boyfriend will be.
Let me state for the record that I do not approve of or condone extra-marital affairs. I do not have respect for any man or woman who choose to step outside of their marriage or the lovers that enable them. There are no excuses whatsoever for having an affair; obviously there is a reason why God has made this a commandment.
All I’m saying is that I think I’m starting to see the appeal in being “the other woman”. Here are some infamous mistresses: