I ran into a male acquaintance a little while back & we started to catch up. He asked me about my relationship status & I told him that I was single but still dating. He told me not to get discouraged & that my husband would come along. As a single woman, I’ve heard that before so I asked him why he thought that out of all the single women out there why I would be one of the fortunate ones to get married.
What he told me made me downright sick to my stomach – He told me that in all the years that he’s known me, I was one of the few women that get better looking as I age. Now, most women would take this as a compliment. We all know that men look more “distinguished” as they get older, while women’s looks tend to go downhill.
The problem is, that the only reason that I look “better” now than ever, is because I wear makeup on a daily basis (going to work will cause you to do that) & have added some hair “extensions”. Between those 2 factors, I look like a new & improved version of myself.
“So, what’s the problem with this?”, you may be asking. Why would I have a problem with someone giving me a compliment? Well, I abhor the fact that I have to wear makeup & have long hair just to be considered more attractive. Yes, I understand that men are visual and studies do show that men prefer longer hair on women, but still – having to do all this extra (the makeup & the hair) just to get a man’s attention makes me feel like without it, I may as well be invisible.
No woman should feel like adding to her natural looks, or natural beauty is necessary. So instead of feeling good about what he said, it actually made me feel very sad.
So why do I wear makeup? I wear it because it makes me look “polished” not “better” (which are not necessarily synonymous). Unfortunately, makeup gets men’s attention but it shouldn’t have to be that way. I should not have to wear long hair & makeup in order for a man to think I’m good looking. That may be the way that it is, but that’s not the way it should be.
We want to be appreciated for our looks, not dependent on it.
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