As you get older, you start wonder what it is exactly that is keeping you from meeting that “special someone.” You see your friends, younger family members & your co-workers get married and even get re-married and you wonder why haven’t you been able to find the love of your life yet although it seems like everyone else has. To know that people are on their second and even third marriages while you’ve never even been married once can be a painful blow not only mentally but also emotionally. How is that some people can find multiple partners, yet I am unable to have just one?
It makes you wonder if there’s something wrong with you or if you’re standards are too high. Why is it so difficult to find the person who is just right for me? Grant it, everyone wasn’t meant to be married and others have chosen to never get married (like a priest or a nun) but when you want something really badly & don’t have it seems like you’ll never have it, it’s only natural to look introspectively.
Naturally, my journey of looking inwards begins with me. How do others perceive me? Am I putting myself out there enough? Or maybe too much (can’t keep going to the same watering holes expecting to meet new people). Do I look & dress the best I possibly can when I go out? Do I reek of high self-esteem or are men turned off by whatever vibe I might be putting out there? Am I making an effort to be the best woman I can be to attract the right type of man (attracting men is easy; it’s all about attracting the right man)? These are all questions every woman should be asking herself when she’s not meeting the kind of man she wants to meet.
Next, I look at my standards. Should I be willing to compromise my standards? And if so, which ones? –
- Should I start dating men with kids?
- What about dating men who don’t have any formal education?
- Should I be okay dating men who are inconsistent & don’t call or take me out regularly?
- What about men who text a lot even though I’ve made it quite clear that I prefer phone calls instead?
- Is it too much to want to be with a man who actually attends church?
- Can I meet a man who doesn’t automatically expect sex (either before or during a relationship)?
These are only some of the standards that I don’t want to compromise & shouldn’t have to. Why is that too much to ask for?