Is He Just “Birthday Using” Me?

I’ve talked before about how not every man likes to spend their birthday alone, but what about when they “re-appear” just so they can have a date for their birthday?

A guy that I used to date has recently started to call me again and I can’t help but wonder if it has anything to do with the fact that his birthday is coming up. I’m sure like the men I’ve written about before, he just wants someone to share it with. When we were dating, he was constantly asking me what I wanted to do for his birthday even though it was months away. His plan was to either take a trip or to have a party but that was dependent on whether or not I was going to be available. Whatever he chose, he just wanted me to be a part of it all.

Months passed and we grew apart. One month after another passed where we didn’t see each other & our phone calls became less frequent. Then all of the sudden, he popped back up. Although we hadn’t really talked in months, he started calling and texting more often. He started asking to see me again and indicated that he wanted to get things back “to the way they used to be.” While it might be somewhat flattering that he wants to be around me, I’m not sure of his intentions. Is it because he actually misses me or is it because his birthday is right around the corner?

I like to call this “birthday using”. This happens when you know you have a birthday coming up, maybe 30-60 days away, and don’t have anyone permanent in your life to spend it with so you revisit the people you used to date just so you won’t be alone on your special day. It doesn’t matter if you like them or not & it may not even matter if they like you. Maybe you would rather brave the night with someone, no anyone, just so long as you’re not alone on your birthday. Either way, if you are reaching out to them around the time of your birthday just so you can say you spent it with someone, then you too are a “birthday user.”

Have you “birthday used” someone before? You knew you didn’t have any dates lined up for your birthday so you did your best to keep someone around just so they could take you out? Talk about it in the comments section below –


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