I recently went out on a date. Because it was my first date with this guy, I had every intention of being on my best behavior but I failed. I did everything I was NOT supposed to do and not because I wasn’t interested in this guy but simply because I wanted to be myself.
I’m not saying that there’s anything wrong with being yourself, but there should be some limits when you’re on a first date.
Here’s what I did wrong –
- I arrived late – it’s always a big no-no to be late for anything. Whether it’s a doctor’s appointment, a job interview or even meeting a friend for lunch, it’s imperative to show respect for other people’s time. I was about 15 minutes late which isn’t too bad but luckily, he was very understanding. I live in Los Angeles so traffic really can be unpredictable but fortunately, we had a nice time so it appears that my running late didn’t impact the quality of the date.
- I didn’t wear perfume – one of the most important elements on a date for a woman is to look nice & smell good. While I did dress nicely, I forgot to spray a little perfume on before leaving for my date. A little bit of the right perfume can go a long way! This isn’t the first time this has happened but hopefully, it will be the last.
- We discussed politics – every handbook, blog & matchmaker will tell you to never bring up politics, religion or money on a date (or various other places). While I understand why this is important, I don’t necessarily abide by this ‘golden rule’. During an election season, it’s almost impossible to not talk about politics; religion is something we all have to face whether we like it or not; and at the very least money can be discussed at a macro level. Not only did we discuss basic politics, I shared some of my personal political values, some of which can be considered very controversial. He even said he enjoyed discussing it with me because most women don’t (let alone be able to defend their position) and it proved I could go deeper than most. Besides, if there is something worth discussing why not discuss it?
- Other women – I did ask him about other women. Not out of jealousy or nosiness, but because I wanted to know what his dating situation consisted of. There’s no point in starting to like someone when they are already tied up with other people. And sometimes the only way to know is to ask.
- I spilled food on myself – this clearly was not done on purpose. We were seated at the bar so I wasn’t able to pull my stool as close to the counter as I would’ve liked. Because I literally had to swivel just to look at him, I mistakenly misgauged the distance between me & my plate. Needless to say, it wasn’t exactly a “sexy move” but we both got a good laugh out of it.
Have you ever done anything on a date that you shouldn’t have? Afterward, were you asked out by that person again?