Every 4th Phone Call… (and other ways to play “hard to get”)

hard to get

I’ve been listening to a lot of dating advice lately (online, from my friends, married people, etc.) and while the advice I hear has been a mixed bag, there has been at least one piece of consistent advice. Men like women who play “hard to get”. Now of course, no man wants a woman who completely ignores him, is rude or is actually disinterested but for some reason there is always some attraction to a woman who plays hard to get.

What does playing hard to get mean? Well, it can mean different things for different people. For some women playing hard to get can be as simple as staying busy, almost too busy, so that the man she likes thinks she’s not that interested in him. Playing hard to get can also mean keeping phone conversations short so that a man is always wanting to talk more (especially since most men don’t usually like to talk on the phone anyway) . But for me, playing hard to get means that I like to take “breaks”. Breaks from talking, texting and even dating. Basically, I make sure that I’m NOT always available.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t completely disappear off the face of the earth, but I do make sure that I am not easily accessible to the man that I am dating. I may text back right away, but sometimes I may hold off on texting back. I may answer the phone the majority of the time that he calls, but not EVERY time. Hence, the title of this post “Every 4th Phone Call….”. Eventually, I’ll call him back but no man likes a woman that’s always available to him; there needs to be some mystery. It’s not even that I have anything to hide it’s just a matter of letting a man know that while he may be important to me, he’s not a priority yet. And by not answering the phone every time he calls, I’m giving the man I like the opportunity to miss me a little bit.

Notice I am talking about the men that I am dating, not a man who is my boyfriend. Those are two totally different roles. If a man is my boyfriend, then he definitely has more access to me than someone I am simply dating. But whether he is my boyfriend or someone I’m casually dating, the key is to let them know that my world doesn’t revolve around them.

Ladies, do you answer EVERY time a guy you like calls you? Guys, do you think about a woman even more when you don’t hear from her as much?


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