We are just about two months into the New Year & it was only the other day that someone actually touched me. No, I don’t mean “touch” as in anything sexual or even sensual, but “touch” as in a hug or even an extended handshake.
You see for a lot of single people like me, we can go days & sometimes even weeks without actually being touched. Just imagine: At work, no one is going to hug you or lay hands on you. So where outside of work would people touch you? The grocery store? Nope, just shopping there. At the gym? No, everyone is in their own world there. How about the gas station? No, everything is self-serve these days. Well, what about at church? Okay, church may be the 1 place where you can get physical contact. Churchgoers are usually touchy feely, which is definitely a good thing. Some churches will tell you to “hug your neighbor” or “greet someone on the way out”. I know mine certainly does that. But not every church is like that. And sometimes you may not be able to stay for the whole service or you may not even be sitting in an area where there is no one to greet. Then what? My point is that without a significant other a lot of time can pass where no one touches me at all.
So how does this make me feel? Well to be honest there are times when it doesn’t phase me. There are certainly other ways to connect with people without having to be “touched”. But other times, like on Valentine’s Day or my birthday, I am reminded of Maslov’s hierarchy of needs & the need for friendship, family, intimacy and a sense of connection.
Do you go out of your way to physically greet your single friends? A hug, a pat on the back or even just a tug at the elbow may be just the touch they need to make their day. If you know someone who’s alone don’t be afraid to “reach out & touch someone’s hand.”