Men Are Gross Too!

If there’s one thing I can’t stand, it’s a man who “adjusts” himself in public. It is one of my biggest turnoffs & it really grosses me out. Who wants to shake someone’s hand after they just touched themselves?

I’ve asked a few men why they do that & I’ve been given the same reason every time – there are certain body parts that can be very uncomfortable until they’re adjusted (ahem!). My follow up question is always, why can’t it wait? Why must you grab your crotch in public out in plain view and not just wait until you’re alone in the restroom or at least sitting down so we can’t see what you’re doing? I would prefer for a guy to leave the room or at least turn his back so I can’t see what he’s doing. Is that too much to ask for?

Men, let’s review some basic guidelines for adjusting your “twig & berries” without looking gross:

Go indirect if possible Depending the severity of your situation, a through-the-pocket fix might be possible. This is highly preferred as it maintains some plausible deniability if you’re caught.

One hand limit If you’re going to attempt a junk adjustment in public, there is a strict one hand limit. At least with one free hand you can use it to create a distraction.

Cross your legs If you’re sitting, crossing your legs can block direct view of your package while you make the required adjustments. This tactic can work well for school, work, or on the train/bus.

Not in front of the ladies All dudes have the same equipment and know how it goes. However, if there are any impressionable ladies present, just grin and bare it or find a private spot.

Get to know hand sanitizer If you’re in the habit of bare handing your balls frequently… you need to clean your hands. Often. That’s practically the same as not washing your hands after using the john…

To prevent the problem:

  • Get new underwear. If you’re still wearing giant, bunchy boxer shorts, it is time to upgrade. If you have giant boxers, it’s no wonder you’re fussing with your junk all the time. Get some boxer briefs and you’ll be happier.
  • Get pants that fit. If your pants are actually tight in the crotch, you’ll never be comfortable.
  • Keep it dry. If it’s hot out, or you have a general sweat issue down below… think about investing in some powder. It’s a little old school, but worth a shot.

Here are some pics of some celebrities who are “adjusting themselves” out in public with absolutely no shame –

adjust 5
(Dean McDermott)

adjust 4
(Sean Stewart)

adjust 6
(Michael Rappaport)

adjust 1
(Chace Crawford)

adjust 3
(Jon Gosselin)

adjust 2
(David Beckham)

 

All I know is that if I ever go out with a man who adjusts himself, it will be the last time we go out. Guys, think before you grope!!

How can men do a better job of “adjusting” themselves in public? I’d love to hear your comments below –

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