This morning my pastor preached on why adultery & fornication is wrong so I felt compelled to write about it. The Bible points out that fornication is wrong throughout both the Old & New Testament. Paul writes:
12 “I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but I will not be mastered by anything. 13 “…The body, however, is not meant for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. 15 Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? 18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. 19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.” – I Corinthians 6
There are many reasons why fornication is wrong (not all Biblical) so let’s break it down –
- You have to set it up – Getting to know someone well enough to sleep with them takes time, energy & money. When you’re married that’s not as much of an issue. Fornicating requires preparation, follow-through & follow-up (you wouldn’t dare sleep with someone & then leave them hanging afterwards, would you?!)
- You have to cover it up – This is particularly true in the case of adultery where the cheating spouse has to answer for their whereabouts. But when you sleep with someone that you aren’t married to you have to ‘protect’ yourself.
- You have to clean it up – When you are sleeping with people outside of marriage, there’s a whole lot of “maintenance” that has to be done for someone who is not even your spouse. Why go through all that trouble when you could be spending time doing other things to better yourself?
Instead of having sex outside of God’s will, you should choose to follow God’s Word:
1) Sex was meant to be 1:1 not 1:50. “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” (Genesis 2:24) Notice God didn’t create multiple women for Adam, all he got was ONE. And even though fornication has been going on since the beginning of time, it was expected that the bride in particular was to be a virgin at the time of marriage. It was never God’s intention that women or men sleep with multiple partners before getting married.
2) Children should be born into a 2-parent home. Not only is this God’s decree, but it holds true for many reasons today. Single parent households can breed destruction & poverty. Children from single parent homes are more likely to suffer from drug & alcohol abuse and achieve lower educational status. Everyone knows that kids fare better when they have both a mother & a father in the home. But when you have sex outside of marriage you run the risk of procreating unnecessarily.
3) Sex outside of marriage spreads disease. Nearly 1 in 3 Americans have an STI (Sexually Transmitted Infection). This includes gonorrhea, syphilis and many other curable diseases. Over 1 million people are HIV infected not to mention the tens-of-thousands who die every year of AIDS. If people didn’t sleep around, these infections/diseases wouldn’t spread (that’s a no-brainer, folks!)
4) “Soul ties” – You may have heard this expression before and may have thought it was just a myth but actually it’s not. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” (Ephesians 5:31) Husband and wife become one not just through the marriage ceremony itself but after consummation. When you sleep with people you aren’t married to it’s like consummating with every single one of them. Not to mention multiple partners before marriage can lead to all types of problems. For some people sex is like a drug, where once you try it & see that nothing bad happens to you right away, you keep doing it. The more you do it, the more you want it. And the more you want it, the more you’re doing something you weren’t supposed to try in the 1st place (just like drugs).
With as many unplanned pregnancies, diseases and “crazy” as there is associated with fornication, things can get out of control quickly.
Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with sex as long as it’s within the confines of marriage. “2 …..each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband” (I Corinthians 7). Sex is supposed to be a beautiful part of marriage, drawing a husband and wife closer to one another (not to mention the making babies part of it). There are many other things that should be held sacred until marriage, such as sharing assets or starting a family.
Hopefully, the next time you think about having sex outside of marriage, just know that your time could be focused on so many other things like learning a new skill, working out, cultivating your friendships, growing in your career or even catching up on your sleep!
There is so much I can say on this topic…..more to come later.