Girls spend their lives waiting to get married … for their prince charming to sweep them off their feet and take them away to their castle and live happily ever after. Think about it, all the fairy tales girls are read while growing up are about handsome princes rescuing princesses in distress. Even my four year old niece the other day told me not to worry because my prince was in his castle far far away waiting for me. (She said she would take me to him if I bought her a new dress … I’m thinking this is a scam lol) These gallant men, good looking, heroic, charming and brave. Even in history we hear tales of the Braveheart’s of the world. Let’s take a look around us… do guys like that even exist? No, or at least I haven’t met any!
Gone are the days when a leader rides into battle ahead of his troops. These days a nation’s leader rules from the comfort and safety of their offices while they send out naive young men and women to fight nonsensical battles. When real trouble ensues they are whisked away to bunkers and places to hide. Where is the gallantry in that? Also, whatever happened to honesty and integrity and honor for that matter. It used to be that someone’s word was their bond.
How many men these days will actually stand up for their woman or any woman in general? How many men will actually defend a woman’s honor? Many men these days are either brutes … selfish and only after their happiness and pleasure … or the other extreme whiny wimps. Women in general are expected to take care of themselves and be independent. I’ve said this before, rare is the man who is a real man. They do exist, I’m not saying they don’t, but they’re a rare commodity these days. Where are the balls in this operation? All I’ve been meeting is men who are all penis and no balls!!
Men often save their bravery and smarts for their own purposes and success and women are just expected to follow along and even be another possession. Then there are the men who are passive and expect the world to just pass them by. They wont fight or try for anything. So what is the definition of a real man these days? We can’t judge them on the prince charming characteristics. I asked around and most women would say what they want in a man is someone who is a good provider for his family, but many women are the main bread winners of the family. Some women said a man who is intelligent, but just because a man is intelligent doesn’t make him a valuable partner. Some women said a man with good social skills and connections, but does that make him more prone to not need her? I suppose a mixture of all of these is desirable, but where do you draw the line?
Let’s face it, men aren’t needed anymore, women have the opportunity to be educated, have good jobs and live independently with friends and family for companionship. They can even have children without a man. So what is the value of having a man? Regardless, isn’t it better to be WANTED and not NEEDED? A partnership of sorts. I wonder sometimes.
Did the need for prince charming disappear when the damsel in distress disappeared? Perhaps. So what is the answer? Should women’s expectations change? Should they be more “passive” while allowing men to regain their “manliness”. Women’s rights groups would call this heresy. But would it restore balance to the world? Think about it. Divorce rates are steadily increasing, even in more traditional families and communities. People are rather choosing not to marry or make long term commitments to each other. Marriages aren’t working. The traditional definition of marriage has to change in order to help it succeed. This generation is stuck in the middle of seeing their parents “sacrifice all” marriage, even in unhappiness and the “esoteric happiness” they long for. Where does the balance come in?
How are people supposed to be happy? I wish I knew the answer.
What do you think? Do you agree? Disagree?
*This article was originally published on Single Dating Diva.